Showing posts with label underwear. Show all posts
Showing posts with label underwear. Show all posts

Monday, May 16, 2011

Let's Talk About . . . Underwear.

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Seriously.  Underwear.  Are you as weird about it as I am?


Now, this is a picture taken with my new Galaxy phone, which, I discovered, has a "Vintage" setting!  Who'd a thunk it?  Of course I had to texture it and everything, but this is a picture of the new underwear I bought yesterday when The Loved One and I went to the outlet mall.  I was desperate for new underwear and I got it.

Okay, but here's the weird part.  My underwear drawer is like a Roach Motel -- new underwear goes in, but nothing ever comes out.  In my last trip to the outlet mall, I bought a whole bunch of underwear, because the underwear I had was sooooo old . . . When I wore the new underwear, I discovered that I hadn't paid attention to the fact that the crotch on the style I bought five or six pairs of (because they were cute) was no more than 1" wide, almost like a thong, really (though the rest of the garment was most definitely not a thong).  As you can imagine, these were not the most comfortable underwear ever worn.  Oh yes, one of the other pairs kind of slid off my behind as I was walking, and it did it one day when I was up in front of the classroom -- every step I took to write something on the board or go back to my notes, the dang things slid another 1/2 inch lower until . . . well, let's just say that it's a good thing I was wearing slacks, or there may not have been a limit to how low they went.

So, did I get rid of this new, unsatisfactory-for-a-whole-variety-of-reasons underwear?  Nope.  It sat in the drawer, and I continued to wear the old, now horribly decrepit, underwear, and I wore the new underwear, despite its issues, whenever I hadn't done laundry in time before I ran out of the old ones.

Is this too much information?  Is this too embarrassing to blog?  I just really want to know whether I'm the only one.  This time, I looked very carefully at what I was buying, and on the way home, in the presence of a witness, I swore that for every pair of the new underwear that actually fits, I would throw away a pair of the old underwear. 
Of course, I didn't say which old underwear.  I didn't say the old-old underwear.  I think I have to hang onto that.  Just in case.